Meredith: [voiceover] It's an urban myth that suicide rates spike at the holidays. Turns out they actually go down. Experts think it's because people are less inclined to off themselves when surrounded by family. Ironically, that same family togetherness is thought to be the reason that depression rates actually do spike at the holidays. Yeah, okay. Izzie doesn't count.

[After Izzie decorated the living room]

George: It looks like Santa threw up in here.

Meredith: Just— go with it, we're being supportive.

Izzie: Oh, hey! What do you think? Did I go too overboard? I know, I know sometimes I can go a little overboard.

George: No, we love it!

Meredith: It's great.

Izzie: Oh, yay! I LOVE CHRISTMAS!

Meredith: We know.

George: [about Dr. Bailey] Look at her belly! She's almost as wide as she is tall!

Meredith: Are her ankles swollen? Is that why she's waddling?

Izzie: What's gonna happen to use when she goes on leave?

Cristina: Leave? She's going on leave?

Meredith: What do you think happens when people push babies out of their vaginas?

George: Do you think we're gonna get a new resident?

Alex: Nah, They'll probably just let us all walk around unattended, see how much damage we can do.

Izzie: Yeah, well, you would know.

Justin's Mom: You hear that, baby? Santa Claus is bringing you a new heart for Christmas.

Justin: Well tell that fat ass to give it to someone else. I don't want it!

Burke: I believe there's a mind-body-spirit connection. And if Justin really doesn't want this heart, his body will reject it.

Cristina: Okay, let me get this straight. You don't just celebrate Christmas...you actually believe in Santa Claus?

George: Paging Dr. Karev-ian [laughter]

Bailey: What did you just say?

George: Ah-it, it's a joke, Kevorkian, Karev-ian...Alex Karev?

Bailey: I get the joke. I just don't think it's funny. You see this O'Malley? I make one mistake with this scalpel and this man's dead. My husband, he makes mistakes at his job all the time. As far as I know he's never killed anyone but I have. And YOU WILL. And Alex did. He made a math mistake and a man died for it. Run that past your accountant - see how he'd feel if every mistake he made, someone ended up dead. You don't have to like Alex, you don't have to care about him, but you damn well have to be on his side.

Derek: Do you know what time of year neurosurgeons are the busiest, Dr. Stevens?

Izzie: There's a time of year?

Derek: There's no hard or fast rule, but brain injuries tend to pile up around the holidays. Like our friend here. Folks fall off their roofs while they string up lights, or when they go skating for the first time in a decade, break their heads open. And every year people drive through blizzards to get to parties where they kiss germ-infected strangers under poisonous mistletoe. And then they get so drunk that they smash their heads through their windshield on their way home. Like I said, there's no hard or fast rule.

[Alex is practicing giving Cristina a breast exam, only it looks like he's groping her]

Cristina: OK, the way you're grabbing me right now, that's assault. [She takes his hand and demonstrates how to give a breast exam] This is an exam. Pat, pat, pat. [George walks in and sees]

George: What? What the hell? Does Izzie know? Does Burke know about this?

Cristina: Unbunch your panties, George, we're helping Alex study. [To Alex] Do it.

George: I can't hear you when his hand is on your boob.

Cristina: Take your hand off my boob, Alex.

Cristina: I believe in medicine. And it's a medical miracle you're alive. And medicine is a lot cooler than Santa. So I'm just saying...I think you should decide to live. Live so you can become a doctor, and you can find a way to do heart transplants without someone having to die. Or, live so you can grow up and have kids and...Raise them not to believe in Santa. That would piss your mom off. Just decide to live. Because in your case, dying really isn't the best revenge.

Alex: Why would you want to help me after what I did?

[Izzie is silent for a moment, shaking with anger]

Izzie: [yells] Because it’s what Jesus would freakin’ do!

Cristina: Okay, seriously, if you are that lonely, there are excellent vibrators. I can give you a catalogue.

Meredith: [voiceover] There's an old proverb that says you can't choose your family. You take what the fates hand you. And like them or not, love them or not, understand them or not, you cope. Then there's the school of thought that says the family you're born into is simply a starting point. They feed you, and clothe you, and take care of you until you're ready to go out into the world and find your tribe.